Remembering
by Selvet
Summary: Lucas and the Commander remember what it was like when they were a family.


**A/N: **So here's the oneshot I've been working on for a longgg time. It was kind of self-inspired by a GIF manip I made haha. I hope you like it! make sure to review and tell me what you thought :) xx

* * *

It pained the Commander to see his son this way. The young man lay on the ground in front of him, his weary face covered with his own blood, wounds inflicted by his father. Lucas stared up at Taylor with hurt, green eyes; he was shocked at what the man had said about his mother.

"Don't say that." His voice was low.

"It's true, boy. You know it's true."

Lucas looked at him in silence, watching as the great leader struggled to stay composed. He didn't move an inch as he considered his father's words. Maybe his mother _would _be ashamed of him. Maybe she would be ashamed of both of them, for allowing this to happen. When she had sacrificed her life, it surely wasn't so that her husband and son could use it in their feud with each other.

"We were a family once," Taylor said quietly.

* * *

_"Daddy! Daddy!"_

_A little boy with dirty-blonde hair and bright green eyes raced forward at the soldier walking through the front door. The tall man swept his four-year-old son up into his arms._

_"Hey there, bud," Lieutenant Taylor said happily._

_Lucas grinned and softly kicked his legs, a sign for his dad to put him back down. Taylor lowered the boy to the ground and began to walk to his room to change out of his uniform. Lucas followed closely behind, rambling on and on about his day. Taylor enjoyed listening to his son's tales of his 'adventures' that he and his mother had while he was working._

_"Mommy was the queen and I was the knight!"_

_"Were you? Weren't you a fireman yesterday?"_

_"Yeah! But knights are better! Knights are soldiers that have swords." He suddenly grabbed his toy sword from the ground outside his parents' bedroom and swung it around to show his father. "And they kill dragons and bad guys and save the queen!" He grabbed his stuffed dragon that had been lying beside the sword, throwing it in the air and smacking it back down with his weapon._

_Nearly everyday Lucas was something different when he got home. There were the things that most little kids would probably think about being: an astronaut, a spy, a firefighter, a superhero, even a dinosaur (which had actually consisted of him stomping around the house and roaring at everyone for almost a week). Then there were the things only Lucas, at his age, would think of: a lawyer, a surgeon, a chemist, a tactical response officer like his uncle, Michael. Taylor could never figure out where his son heard of some of these jobs, or why they would interest a four-year-old._

_He watched as the boy clambered up onto the bed, acting out some epic battle scene, thrusting the plastic weapon forward and swinging it about wildly as he jumped up and down. Taylor had no idea how Lucas always had so much energy after an entire day of doing the exact same thing._

_"And did you save the queen?" he asked as he tugged off his boots and placed them in the closet._

_"Yes!" Lucas laughed, out of breath. "I'm a knight. I always protect Mommy."_

_"Good job, Sir Lucas," Taylor joked. "When I'm not here, that's your job: protecting the lady of the house."_

_"Oh is it? I need to be protected?" Ayani asked from the doorway, arching her eyebrows._

_"You never know." Taylor smiled, standing up and making his way over to his wife. He gave her a light kiss, pulling back when they heard Lucas giggling quietly, the way only a four-year-old would react._

_Ayani walked over to him as he stood up on the edge of the bed, holding his arms out for her to carry him. "Well I think I can take care of myself…but I wouldn't mind a little help from Lucas as well," she laughed, putting the child back on the ground. "Well I've got to go finish making dinner. It should be ready soon."_

_After she left, Lucas yanked his sword of the bed and ran out of the room, attempting to chop up anything in his path. Taylor jogged after him, sweeping the wild child up into his arms._

_"Hey, bud, calm down. Let's go put on a movie for you or something? You've gotta sit still for a little while."_

_"But I'm trying to play my game," Lucas whined, lightly hitting his father's legs with the sword. And when that didn't work, the boy sighed dramatically, going completely limp in his father's arms._

_Taylor chuckled, placing the boy on the couch and turning on one of his favorite movies. It was incredibly old, but when Lucas saw it for the first time, he'd been completely mesmerized by it. Taylor was never fully paying attention but he knew it was called the Land Before Time and had dinosaurs that talked. Lucas dropped his sword and watched intently, attempting to name each type of cartoon dinosaur he saw. After a while though, the boy grew quiet and Taylor found himself watching the movie, wondering what it was like back when there were dinosaurs and tropical lands._

* * *

_"Dinner's ready," Ayani called from the dining room._

_"Lucas?" There was no reply. Taylor glanced around; he could've sworn Lucas had been sitting right next to him a couple of seconds ago. But now, the boy had completely vanished._

_"Uh, be right there," he called back._

_He slowly made his way towards the dining room, peeking into the office, thinking Lucas had wandered in there again. Not seeing him there, he moved on, walking to his son's room. The door was wide open, revealing the small bedroom with a floor blanketed with books and a few toys but no Lucas. He then went to the kitchen, but again, the boy was nowhere to be found. Taylor huffed in annoyance, wondering where the kid could've gone; their house really wasn't that big._

_When he turned around, he froze, mouth slightly agape as he stared at the sight in front of him._

_Lucas stood in the doorway, attempting to look up at his dad. Taylor's camouflage jacket covered his entire body, the ends of it on the floor. He wore his father's large, tan helmet, ignoring the fact that it was making sight nearly impossible. He held on with both hands - though the oversized sleeves made it hard to see where exactly they were - as he stared upward, a triumphant smile on his face._

_"Wh-what happened to your knight outfit?" he said, trying to hold back laughter._

_"I didn't want to be a knight anymore. Knights aren't real soldiers…they're not heroes in real life," Lucas said matter-of-factly._

_Taylor grinned, arching his eyebrows. "They aren't?"_

_Lucas shook his head, stumbling a bit when the heavy helmet seemed to make his head begin to fall to the side. He regained his balance, holding it firmly on his head._

_"So you're a real soldier now?"_

_The boy nodded, giving his father a toothy grin. "I'm you, Daddy."_

_The soldier gaped at his little son, shocked. Of all of the boy's costumes and fantasies and games, Lucas had never once expressed any desire to be…him. Taylor smiled, blinking a few times when he felt his eyes moisten._

_"C'mon, kiddo. Let's go get some dinner and show Mom your new costume," he chuckled, picking him up into his arms._

_Lucas frowned. "It's not a costume, Dad. It's my uniform."_

_"Okay, let's go show her your uniform." He grinned and walked into the dining room as Lucas tightly gripped the helmet so it wouldn't fall off._

* * *

_Lucas glared at the vegetables on his plate, weakly pushing them around with his fork. Every once and a while he'd look up at his parents, holding his dad's helmet with one hand and pouted at them before resuming his activity. Taylor chuckled, also avoiding the greens on his dinner plate._

_"Lucas, will you please eat your vegetables?" Ayani begged, growing frustrated._

_The boy shook his head quickly. "Mommy, I can't. They're icky," he whined, sticking his tongue out in disgust._

_Ayani thought for a moment before continuing. "Well if you want to get big and strong someday like all of your dad's soldiers, you'll need to eat those vegetables," she said, taking a bite of her own dinner and smiling at her husband proudly._

_"But he's not eating his veggies!" Lucas pointed at his father across the table with his little fork. "So real soldiers don't have to eat them…so I don't have to."_

_He grinned triumphantly while his mother simply stared at him and his father scoffed. Ayani turned to him, giving him a death glare. Taylor arched his eyebrows, understand the message and taking a huge spoonful of peas from his plate and eating them._

_"See, Lucas? I love vegetables," he said to his son, glancing over at Ayani who nodded in approval. "All of us soldiers do. It's a requirement!"_

_The four-year-old arched his eyebrows in surprise. If his father liked vegetables, then he had to as well. He stared at his plate and gulped before stabbing a few of the peas with his fork and quickly shoving them in his mouth as he shut his eyes tightly. Lucas swallowed thickly then opened on eye slowly, then the other as if he wasn't sure he was alive. Ayani laughed at her son's dramatic attitude._

_"Good job, boys," she said, smiling at her family as they continued to eat._

* * *

_Taylor was sitting in the living room, reading through an old book about World War II on his plex, wondering if he could use any of the battle tactics when Ayani walked out of their son's room with a frustrated expression. She plopped down on the sofa next to her husband, tying her hair back into a bun._

_"So he's in bed…well sitting on his bed…but he refuses to go to sleep because he claims that soldiers don't have bedtimes… And I did get him out of your uniform, but he still has on that helmet. When I tried to get it off him, he held onto it so tightly, his knuckles were turning white," she laughed. "He's really into trying to be just like you."_

_The lieutenant chuckled. "Ah, it's just another one of his phases, I'm sure he'll be something else tomorrow, like a mad scientist or a pirate again. I don't think being like me is something he'd really want to do anyway…"_

_"Why not?" Ayani frowned, turning to sit so she faced him. "I mean he's always trying to please you. He's a smart kid, Nathaniel. I don't think the different games and 'jobs' he comes up with are just his fantasies…I think a lot of it has to do with him trying to figure out what you want him to do and be."_

_Taylor pondered over the idea, realizing for the first time how everyday when he came home, Lucas would run over in whatever make-shift costume he had and presented it to him. He would wait silently for his father's approval and when he got it, he seemed relieved._

_"He really looks up to you, you know…"_

_He nodded. "Well let's see if I can get our little soldier to bed," he told her, getting up._

_When Taylor walked into his son's room, he saw Lucas sitting cross-legged in the center of his bed, looking exhausted. His eyelids were drooping as he struggled to stay awake. The heavy helmet caused his head to hang forward a bit and he didn't even look over when his father entered._

_"Hey bud," Taylor said as he sat down next to Lucas. "It's bed time."_

_Lucas suppressed a yawn, looking away when he couldn't hold it in and hoping his father didn't notice._

_"No, I have to stay up…" he yawned again, "…and keep watch…I'm a soldier," he said sleepily._

_Taylor chuckled. "No, you don't have to. I'm a soldier too. I can take the first watch," he suggested, knowing that if he could get Lucas to fall asleep at all, he'd be out for the rest of the night. "What do ya say?"_

_Lucas sat in silence, eyes glazed over and fixated on his large bookshelf across from his bed. He just wanted to help and be a strong, brave soldier like his dad. He didn't need sleep. Lucas huffed in annoyance._

_"I'll sleep when I'm dead…" Taylor was sure the boy had stolen that line from some movie. "Only weak soldiers need sleep," Lucas said matter-of-factly. Sometimes the kid just didn't sound like a four-year-old at all._

_His father gasped, doing his best to look offended. "I love sleeping! Are you calling me weak?" he asked, pouting._

_The child's green eyes widened in horror. He shook his head quickly. "No! Don't be sad!" he begged when Taylor continued his act. "If I go to bed, will you be happy again?"_

_Taylor sniffed, pretending to wipe his eyes. He nodded and almost immediately climbing toward the top of his bed and burrowing all but his head under the covers. Taylor felt slightly bad for tricking his son by pretending his feelings had been hurt, but it had worked. Lucas waited for approval, watching his father._

_"Thank you, Lucas…but um…what about the -"_

_Lucas quickly gripped the helmet that still rested on his head. "No, I wanna wear it!"_

_"Kiddo, it's time for bed. You don't need the helmet when you're sleeping."_

_Lucas thought for a moment before kicking off the blankets again and standing up. Taylor sighed, thinking he would have to start all over again when he felt Lucas placing the helmet on his head. The boy took a step back as he nodded, wobbling on the bed minutely._

_"Wha- "_

_"Well if you're gonna take the first watch, you should be wearing a helmet! Right?" Lucas plopped back onto the bed and lied down._

_Taylor nodded in agreement. "Alright. Well thank you for being concerned for my safety, Private Taylor."_

_"You're welcome, Da- Lieutenant Taylor," Lucas said proudly, grinning._

_"Well let's get you tucked in now."_

_Lucas curled up as his father pulled the blankets over him then standing up._

_"Goodnight, Lucas," he said, leaning down to kiss the top of his head. "I love you."_

_"Goodnight, Daddy," he yawned. "I love you too."_

* * *

Lucas' brow cinched together, his eyes watering as he stood hesitantly. He didn't want this anymore, this pain that had been eating away at him for eleven years. And as he wrapped his arms around his father, the memories washed over him and the hurt began to melt away.

"I remember."


End file.
